Not Regret The Past

I have been thinking a lot about my past. What if I had done this, or what if I had done that. In the end it really does not matter what I have done before. It is what am I doing with it at this moment? I can be a victim of my past or I can be a survivor. Today I choose to be a survivor. I choose to take my life and do something with it.
I have been feeling a little down lately and wondered why. I realize now it is because of possibly some medication issues. I really looked deep to find the source of why I was always so tired. This is call taking care of myself. This is something that I would have never done in the past. I would have let things go until it is was a critical moment. I am going to a therapist for the first time because I want to. Not because someone is making or suggesting that I go. But because I want to go. Big change.
The 9th Step Promises are coming true. I am amazed at where I am. These last few months have been a huge financial strain. Most of the time I have very little money to live off of after I pay bills. Being off for a month or so really put me behind. I am now playing catch up and most times it seems like I will never catch up. But as the 9th step promises has told me Fear of economic insecurity will leave. I no longer have that fear. I have faith. I have faith that the God I serve will take care of me. It is so true. I don't ever get an abundance but I get just what I need to get by. Some day my life will not be just getting by. Some day it will be about making it and enjoying life. That means not having that financial cloud hanging over me. It will be okay. I will be okay.