Today I felt a little disconnected from becoming a man. Not that I don't want to do this. I just am trying to figure out ways to pass off as a man more. Use to be that I was called sir all the time. Now its the opposite. What the hell is going on? What do I need to do to man it up some more? Not sure what I need to do to change things. It is a little disappointing that I am going through this and even strangers can see that I am still female. Bad enough I have to wait to go through surgery to have my gender changed. I am a man in mind, a man in my body and a man in my world. Why can't people see that? What do I have to do?
I don't want to come across as hardcore, that is just not my style. Is it the way I am dressing? The way I carry myself? So many fucking questions. So fucking frustrating.
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