Been Awhile

It's been awhile since my last entry. Lot going on in my life but I just continue to try and have some faith that it will all work out. I feel like my hormonal changes are all good. I am gaining more confidence in myself, can speak up for me without getting angry. Could this be changes because of the T? Or am I just gaining confidence in myself because of who I am becoming? I feel so free these days even in the midst of all the changes I am doing. I might be isolating a little but I think its the down time that I needed. Here is a fear that I need to get out. As I am looking for a job, I have changed the resume to state Charley. When I am getting calls people are saying he and yes sir. What the fuck do I do when I get to the face to face interview? Have to check with the other guys in my group about that? These days I am up for getting suggestions on about any life changing thing I am doing. I guess AA taught me that. Amazing what I bring with me through being in recovery.
While I am home I try and stay productive and busy. Up to 100 push ups a day and 100 sit ups. Work out with a couple of guys online through video chat. I never realized what I comfortable feeling I had being able to see those two and talk to them. It was amazing. It was just like I was where I belong.
I need to be able to write more and get my feelings down on paper on screen whatever. This is my journey and I want to be able to record it somehow. Just for my own personal keepsake. Perhaps it could help another older guy like me new in transition.
So its been 4 months on T. It seemed like yesterday I was given the script and now its been 4 months. At 6 months I can start giving the injections myself! I think for me through everything that has happened and happening, I am still able to stand tall and be the man I need to be. It is amazing to see this.
I am feeling a down about the possibility of having to move and no real job. I still have everything I need to get me through. I am becoming the man I want the world to see.