My First Tux

I am going to a formal event in April and I got fitted today for my first tux ever. So many firsts is happening in my life since my transition. Going to the the event will be my first formal affair I have ever attended. It is also the first time I have been fitted for a suit. I had a little anxiety when the woman was measuring me. What if she discovers I am different. What will she say. What does she think? It was very painless and I must say I felt really at ease.
So I now know my suit size and will be going out buying my own suit to own in the future. This world has opened up so much of a world I never knew. In high school I couldn't go to the prom in a tux. It was the 70's I would have been laughed out of there. I stayed at home. Everyone else went to the prom but I didn't. I don't remember if it bothered me or not. I just remember not being a part of the conversation of all the happenings the following Monday. I didn't even know where the after parties were. So I just stayed home that night. I do remember my Mother asking me if I was upset. I would have never voiced it if I was.
I was different and that was all that it was. No one asked me to go and so I was not going. I was not going to wear a dress and I could't wear what I wanted to.
Life being a lesbian was pretty tough back then. I just didn't fit in anywhere at that moment.
I don't even know if anyone missed me. No one asked.