Thursday, July 12, 2012

Just For Today

So its been awhile since I post and I keep telling myself I am going to get better at this. But of course I slip. I have got to put my thoughts and feelings out here just to help me from keeping them all in.
I am doing okay. Work is good, my family is well and I am adjusting to life. I never thought I would say I am comfortable being single. But its is not all that bad. I have a good life right now. Just for today. I am feeling good about losing almost 30 pounds and am going to keep eating healthy and need to pump up the workout more. Right now I am going to workout at home since I am trying to save money and the gym is not something I can afford right now.
I was at one point doing 100 push ups and sit ups and need to get back to that. Man was I feeling strong when I was doing them! I don't know if it was all in my mind or if it was really happening but I felt like I was bulking up!
So since the last time I wrote I on here I guess I really had not talk about the changes that I am seeing since being on T for 9 months. I am beginning to get more hair on my thighs and knuckles. I know that a crazy thing to notice but hair on my knuckles was a big deal for me! I have to shave every day or I have that teenage fuzz look. I really don't need a beard or a mustache to make me the man I am wanting to be.
I guess I am just throwing a lot of random thoughts out here today.

My time with my therapist Michael is ending this month and we are having a hard time connecting. With me working in Richmond a lot we really could not connect. I am feeling okay with just chilling out for a little while and shopping around for a therapist this time what will understand the trans thing.
I remember when Jen left I was really sad and it took awhile for Michael and I to connect. I don't really think we ever really totally connected but he gave me what I needed for the time that he gave. I needed to be with a male therapist to get some of the male take on things.
I am going to take a holiday until about September on seeing a therapist and then I will find one through the Fan Free Clinic. Someone who has knowledge of the trans life.

Just for today I am good. I am feeling okay mentally and emotionally and I am relaxed with my life.
Just for today.

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